The Even Greater Tokyo Region

The Russian House

The house on Rubens Place is known as the Russian House. I am making this known now so that in future references, I may quite possibly make Russian jokes. Although if I ever make any Yakov Smirnoff jokes, you have my permission to send me to the firing squad, that is, if they don't get to me first. "They" are the Russians who I am flatting with. Yes, like any (im)migrant, it is very difficult to interact with the regular locals. I know, soon the New Zealand neighbours will be saying "Those stupid Dutch and Russians always hang out with each other and don't try to integrate into society".

As has already been made public, I have a long affinity with Russian culture, by which I mean I once bought a Red Army hat for 50 cents. It was an excellent hat which served me well for a costume party and the equally ridiculous national elections in Holland.

Furthermore, according to online computer facial recognition programs, the celebrity I most resemble is Dolph Lungdren. Okay, it is maybe a stretch to call him a celebrity, but we all know him as Ivan "The Russian" Drago from Rocky IV.


The photo below may remind you of me a little more.


Also, I enjoy doing a Natasha Fatale accent from the ancient cartoon series Rocky and Bullwinkle. For those who either don't know this series, or for those that love it, take a look and be reminded how great cartoons used to be.


Note: I have found that when doing this Natasha accent, to make perfectly clear that you are trying to sound Russian, is it best to also mime stroking an imaginary cat in the manner of a super-villain. I have yet to be drunk/brave enough to try this accent on my flatmates, but I am sure they will love it. Because everybody loves to have their accent imitated in front of them.

So, that is pretty much what goes on behind that picket fence of mine. And don't worry, I am strong-willed and will not succumb to selling state secrets.

On the other hand...