I am a LomographerNo, this does not (necessarily) mean that I am sexually attracted to lemmings. That would "Lemography". Those cheeky little critters. No, lomography is photography with a fish-eye lens. I was given one recently and so have been able to take a new look at this country. And since that is basically what I try to do on AtHome in Ho-Land, here are a few of the better ones, along with cheeky comments where appropriate.


We start with something very Dutch: Tulips. I have worked at the Tulip park a fair bit this season, and I am sick to death of those stupid flowers.


This is in the seaside town of Katwijk, known for its conservative Christians who frown upon neighbours who hang out laundry on Sundays and its beaches which are nice about 3 months of every year. And even during those three months, you'll be lucky to get weather like this.
This is a typical forest of East Netherlands. Tall trees evenly spaced (basically all the forests are planted by people), and easy access walking paths through them. Seriously, on this very path, we saw many cyclists, a horse-drawn carriage, and an old man on a segway. Yes, a freaking segway.
And here is a goodie. In the middle of this forest is this giant hole in the earth. Well, remember, this is Holland, which is flatter than Kelly Ripa, Kate Moss, Keira Knightley and Natalie Portman. (I am stealing this idea from Bill Simmon's 28th August 2009 mailbag of the "A-team" which is the top five hottest females with A-cups)

This place is called the Solse Gat, which was formed by a giant piece of ice that remained after the last ice-age. Or, if you prefer to believe in stupid things, this was the place where a monastry was, where all the monks sold their souls to the devil. Then, their monastry was sucked into the earth like a giant reverse anus.

A Chinese gardens near Groningen. These gardens were huge, and it was created by authentic Chinese people who were brought in as temporary workers to make these gardens. This just goes to show how much unused money Holland has, and how willing Chinese people are to get it.
This building next to the station Leiden Centraal. It has gone up very rapidly. The sheer ugliness of the building show that again, also show that we have way too much unused money.

A windmill on beautiful day with a Dutch cloud in the sky, with a carnival in front of it. Carnies: the under-scrotum of society.

This is my favourite city to walk around in Holland is Den Haag. For some reason it translated to "The Hague". I don't understand. I mean, French people don't call New York "Nouvelle York". Why can't people just mispronounce this city name just like they do with any other Dutch city?






One last note on the Lomograph, it is apparently an old communist invention, intended to be a communistic way to represent the world. That sounds about right. Expect another installment of Lomography in the future.

Spot the Difference

Take a close look at these two photos and spot the difference. It may be difficult to see, but there is one major discrepancy between the two.
These photos were taken in quick succession, so what could possibly be different? I'll tell you. In the 2nd photo, I have just paid off all my student debt. ALL of it. One click, and suddenly, I had a net-worth of zero.

It felt amazing. I was suddenly worth nothing. After years and years of owing money, going back to school, accumilating debt, in one moment I absolved all of my debt.

This all happened a few weeks ago. So, how is all this working out for me?

I am blessed to be Dutch, as it made my student lifestyle much more bearable. I have always lived minimalistically. Hell, I even became mostly vegetarian. And no, it wasn't because of some morally-superior stance that most vegetarians have; I love tearing into a piece of animal flesh as much as the next carnivore. No, I became vegetarian to save money. So, since 2004 I have been living as if I was poor, just to minimise my money-lending.

If I hadn't done this, I am positive that I would be in bigger debt than Greece. However, because I was a student, I always had a safety net. I could always borrow more money if I needed to.

But now, no longer a student, and having paid off my debt, for the first time in my life, I am actually poor. I live week by week. I take the scraps of work that are offered to me, and I dread the letter in the mail containing bills. Being poor is rough!

On the other hand, I love that I am living the romantic artistic lifestyle. I now have the opportunity to become a rags-to-riches story.

The other day, I was coming home from a day of work at the dreadfully touristy flower park of Keukenhof. There was a huge line for the buses, so I decided to use the time to write something. Sure, writing while standing isn't ideal, but I can't waste 90 minutes of my life just waiting. After a while, a girl in the line started up a conversation with me:

Her: "Are you writing a book?"
Me: "No, I'm just writing a diary."
Her: "Oh, I thought you might be a writer."
Me: "Well, I want to be, one day."
Her: "So did you come here [to the flower park] for inspiration?"
Me: "No, I came here to work. Even a writer has to eat."

So, my recent brush with authentic poorness has taught me a valuable lesson. Even a writer has to eat.

Lentils, probably.

Hopefully soon I will be able to take a new "after" photo, one where the difference won't be so hard to spot.